Nobody likes me. Everybody hates me.
Have you ever hesitated to ask someone out on a date? Perhaps you didn't
ask for the date because of the fear of rejection. The fear of rejection
is so powerful that it is most often the culprit in forcing us to miss
great opportunities. We are afraid to ask for a date, a sale, a job, a pay
raise, a promotion, a better price, or chance to speak to a group about
our accomplishments because we are afraid of rejection.
Please don't yell at me! I will melt!
Perhaps, the second most powerful variation of fear is that of
confrontation. Many of us are afraid of confronting someone else. Why?
Confrontation means directly facing an uncomfortable, or even hostile,
situation. The job interviewer seems concerned about your resume and
expects you to have a good explanation for your employment gap. That can
seem confrontational. You might think that in a confrontation you could
get hurt emotionally with words or name calling, physically with violence,
or spiritually because you feel awful about pointing out someone's flaw or
problem. Fear of confrontation stops many of us for asking for our money
back, getting an apology, or someone else to cease their inappropriate
Are you being held back?
Is the fear of rejection or confrontation holding you back from getting
the job you want? Getting a job is like making a sale. Your experience is
what is for sale and it is your job to sell it to the company that is
hiring. Even the best salespeople know you are not going to make a sale to
every customer. In fact if you are making 1 out of 10 you are doing well.
9 out of those 10 customers are going to reject the salesperson or even
become confrontational about price, quality, or benefits. If the
salesperson took it personally she would shut down and stop making sales.
That means she wouldn't have an income anymore. That's just not an option.
Get over your fear of rejection and confrontation by labeling them
something else. While giving each sales presentation (job interview) your
best effort, keep a count. Welcome each rejection or question, because
each "no" brings you closer to that magic number 10, also known as "yes"!